20 Things I've Learned From TV and Movies

20 Things I've Learned From TV and Movies


1. If being chased through town, you can usually take cover in a passing St. Patrick's day parade at any time of the year.

2. All grocery shopping bags contain at least one stick of French bread.

3. It is easy for any one to land a plane, providing there is someone in the control tower to talk you down.

4. A detective can only solve a case once he has been suspended from duty.

5. The ventilation system of any building is a perfect hiding place. No one will ever think of looking for you in there and you can travel to any other part of the building without difficulty.

6. You are likely to survive any battle in any war unless you make the mistake of showing someone a picture of your sweetheart back home.

7. The Eiffel Tower can be seen from any window of any building in Paris.

8. A man will show no pain while taking the most ferocious beating but will wince when a woman tries to clean his wounds.

9. When paying for a taxi, never look at your wallet as you take out a note and just grab one at random and hand it over. It will always be the exact fare.

10. Cars and trucks that crash will almost always burst into flames.

11. People on TV never finish their drinks.

12. A single match will be sufficient to light up a room the size of a football stadium.

13. Any person walking from a nightmare will sit bolt upright and pant.

14. Even when driving down a perfectly straight road, it is necessary to turn the steering wheel vigorouslyfrom left to right every few moments, and maintain a stern expression.

15. One man shooting at 20 men has a better chance of killing them all than 20 men firing at one.

16. When you turn out the lights to go to bed,everything in your room will still be clearly visible, just slightly bluish.

17. Action heroes never face charge for manslaughter or criminal damage despite laying entire cities towaste.

18. No matter how badly a spaceship is attacked, its internal gravity system is never damaged.

19. All bombs are fitted with electronic timing devices with large red readouts so you know exactly when they are going to go off.

20. It is always possible to park directly outside the building you are visiting.